by Charles Ribakoff

(Note from Charles: If this column stops suddenly, it’s probably because I have been struck by lightning. Remember me kindly).

Hold the presses.

Back in February, I posted an article called The Future of Chrysler. I thought it was only a matter of time before the bible was revised to rename the prophets Abraham, Isaac, Jacob and Charles.

What a great gig that could have been. Not quite the same poetry as, say, John, Paul, George and Ringo (or even as Dirk, Stig, Leppo, and Nasty, the pre-fab four), but, still, think of the sales potential: one in every hotel room, plus door to door summer sales. And the residuals…. But I digress.

Turns out I may not have been prophetic enough to qualify for my own biblical edition, although I got it pretty close to right. Now that Chrysler has been Obamaed and inepted into Chapter 11, this is a good time to revisit the future of Chrysler. The intent here is to make the point this is a great time to buy one (this is, after all, a social media attempt by a purveyor of autos), and the lay out, at least for my own benefit, where all this goes.

Chrysler, and its dealers, have been fighting the good fight. Even with all the uncertainty, Chrysler’s market share has actually been going up. Their management team has let the pressure get to them a bit – Jim Press, the co-president of whom I have written glowingly, now sometimes sounds like a cross between a crack crazed Craig’s List patron and a snapping turtle when trying to convince us to buy additional inventory– but have kept aggressive sales and marketing strategies, and provided both leadership and hand holding. Dealers like me (I refer to us, with some pride, as the cockroaches of retail – we figure out how to survive almost any situation from nuclear winter to wearing a Red Sox hat in Yankee Stadium) have made draconian cuts and adjustments, and tried to figure out survival strategies. The federal government gave a shot at reassuring customers when they announced they would back Chrysler warranties (although the thought of Joe Biden coming over to change my oil does not exactly fill me with confidence).

In the end, there were too many things to fix, and not enough time, and we didn’t get it done. So yesterday, Chrysler filed Chapter 11.

I was trying to explain what this Chapter 11 stuff means in an employee meeting yesterday, in terms even Boris, the official hat of winter, could understand. I came up with this analogy. My daughter Nicki, who is 7, likes to play poker with me. She cheats, and makes me play my Euros against her dollars, but that’s a whole different discussion. When she makes a really bad move, like drawing a 2 to try to make a pair, she asks for a do-over. Then she tries to do it right.

I could have also described Chrysler’s Chapter 11 as the financial equivalent of a high colonic, but I’m not sure Nicki would have understood as well.

If you think of Chapter 11 as your 7 year old asking for a do-over, you will, without doubt, be tossed out of law school, but you’ll have the basic concept.

In Chrysler’s intergalactic do-over, they get to flush all those evil bankers who thought a reasonable expectation of lending money is that you might actually get paid back. Near as I can figure, tens of thousands of retirees who had kind of had their lives set up with certain income and health care expectations woke up this morning to figure out a different set of expectations. Lots of Chrysler dealers probably didn’t sleep very well last night, although there’s nothing new about that. There are generations of mistakes and inefficiencies that…presto…go away.

In the do-over, in my version that I use to explain it to my hat, Chrysler (actually, the bankruptcy court judge, but let’s not let too many facts get in the way here), gets to figure out what they want to do with these nuisances, and other ones too numerable and mind numbing to consider.

After all these things go through the grinder, what will come out will be a sausage (which, given the Fiat connection, you can make mine pepperoni) where, one hopes equitably (but hires high powered council just in case), a new company sans baggage emerges.

There will be many fewer dealers, which, for those of us left, will be a good thing. It will increase the number of customers who come to us for service, and, ultimately, sales.

Harr will, by any metric I can think of, be one of those surviving dealers. We sell more Chryslers, Jeeps and Dodges than anyone else in our market, have superior customer satisfaction scores in both sales and service, and, through our municipal vehicle operation, offer the opportunity for large numbers of fleet sales. We further have a prime location on the busiest street in Worcester, and 61 years of continuous, hands on family ownership (ok, only 29 of those are with Chrysler).

So why should you buy one? Chrysler’s incentives remain the most generous in the industry (because, frankly, they have to be), and the products remain world class. The post-bankruptcy company will be competitive on the world stage, and the warranties are backed by the U.S. government. It is indeed a good day to buy one.

Although if Joe Biden comes over to fix yours, make sure he didn’t come by subway.